Trying2live- the new post 1

[TxMomw/2girls]

T2L -

Ok I read your post over the weekend but didn't have time to respond.... I thought a lot about what you said. I'm so glad you stood your ground.. it is so hard to decided which is the right way. But I do agree that if they don't feel the effects of D and how it will be they will continue to have there cake and eat it too....


Until we are done in our hearts, we then can make decisions on how friendly we would like it to be but until then we need to stand strong.

I have juggle with two rules of thought... one be nice, let them come over, maybe they'll see what they are missing... but then at least in my shoes, he is in the heat of his A this wouldn't make him miss anything..he needs to miss his kids, not be able to just stop by to pick up his golf clubs and kiss his girls - ... it is hard I have such young babies that I also need his help or somedays I'm going crazy...

I'm going 5 weeks since the bomb and he moved out last Monday... staying with the OW as this is easy and fun I'm sure... he hasn't done one thing to get his own place, call a guy friend to crash... nothing. So my friend over the weekend said the same thing you said T2L ... don't let him come see his kids and get his "family" fix and then off back to the OW house... he needs to feel the full repsonsiblity of having the kids for a whole weekend or whole night not just a few short hours. Just how it would be if we were D.

So I told him that I would like him to watch the girls this Saturday until Sunday as I have tennis match this Saturday morning... then I asked on separate email if he'd be in his appartment by then... I'm sure if I hadn't mentioned this he would have thought he could come to the house and stay here with them. Not happening... So when we talked today he said he called a few places and would be looking at them this week and he thought he'd be in a place by Saturday.. he better ....

Marisol - nice to see your H is seeing a 21yr old... what the $ell??? My H is with a 25 yr old... I'm sorry you are down the D road already.

I do ask myself everyday... could I really take a man back that has abbandoned me and my kids... I am in my mind moving on and trying day by day to get stronger - we'll see how long I can hope and hold on..

I continue to pray for all of us... I'm proud of you T2L for holding strong... and thanks for all the disclosure info on my thread...