Wow! You definitely told him! Good for you!! How did it feel afterwards? I believe you had a good point to make in that you would have to take care of these things as if you were D and for him to try to be 'nice' but then go home to someone else is wrong because you are still technically married!!!
After I took the truck from my H, it did feel good because he was eating the cake! Letting the OW drive it, him not have to worry about making a car payment, pay car insurance, he had no worries! Then I took it and he was scrambling to get a car, now he has a car payment, insurance, and I'm sure the OW is looking at him like why can't he get his $rap together!!
The strength within us all is building every day that passes. Our focus must continue to be on ourselves and our children. The more we stand our ground the more they will see us in a new light. We have to hold on to that light no matter what. If our H's come back or not, that light is our lifeline. It is our new life and we cannot look back into the darkness behind us. It is this light in front of us that will keep us moving, keep us going, keep us focused on what is right, powerful, and true.
As much as our H's have hurt us, our love for them is unconditional. I have been praying every day even though I am on the road to D. I have been saying the hedge of thorns prayer every day before work and at night and I am telling you all small things have been changing. It is almost as if it is a sign. It is still too early to tell for me. Although I know if I were to take him back many of my family and friends would be very disappointed in me. That makes it difficult. I worry for my daughter as well. She has also been through so much pain, I could not bare to have her be hurt again if he were to do this yet again to me. This is where my uncertainty lies.
I am just taking it day by day asking God to show me the right way to go.
I pray for all of you too....
Me35/H35 D16/SS14 M-1yr/known H 18yrs 1st Bomb: 4/26 OW35 2nd Bomb: 8/17 OW21 Moved out 8/21/08 H filed D on 9/9/08
God determines who walks into your life...it's up to you to decide who you let walk away, who you let stay, and who you refuse to let go.
