Thanks again for your response. I have changed so much in a relatively short time, that I feel everything around me is just moving to slow. I know you and others have preached patience. I just can't seem to do it some days. I pray every night. I ask God for the strength for one more day, every day. She has been contacting me more, about the things I have told you. Her brakes, selling my campsite (of which she was told I am paying of the laon catching up my mortgage and thats all there will be enough for). I have heard many things that can hapen. I am very scared things will not come around to me. I try to keep thisout of my head, but there are people telling me to forget her, move on, find someone else, she ha, blah, blah blah. I can't . I just can't fathom her not coming back. I have made my changes intially for her, but I see the benefit to myself daily. The way people have changed towards me, my kids, my family...I like who I am now, I need her to like me now, and want to be with me. But I also know that is not my decision. I believe if this OM was out of the picture, my holidays without her would simply be a nightm,are, not reality. I think I am cracking her a bit, I want to believe it. I am a strong supporter of the going dark, or at least dim and not belieivng anything she says. My convictions are strong. There is a song by Meatloaf i play everyday called no matter what these are my words: I can’t deny what I believe I can’t be what I’m not I know this love’s forever I know no matter what
I believe she will be back, I cannot act like she isn't, i absolutely believe our love is forever, no matter what. People have told me i am not realistic thinking this way. My firend who went throguh the MLC and others I have read from, give me hope. Do you agree with my attitude?
