Another one for me

[sandycay]

Ha ha Jen, I knew it bothered him....The most important thing is: Read this part slowly: It bothers him that it bothers him!

On the cell phone issue...I would bring it up nicely and figure out a nice DB way of saying I will respect your privacy if you respect mine. My H had a key for awhile to our house and our garage code. Now Jodie told me weeks before to ask for it. He had moved out and wouldn't even take the kids to see his new place yet. So finally I did it and said when you give me a key to your place, I'll give you back your key to the house.

He still didn't get it that maybe I needed privacy at that point. (I didn't need it, but maybe I would have in the future, and maybe he needed to wonder why) But that I was going to respect that he needed his Man Cave. That's what I called it. The kids counselor even suggested to us that we all go over and have pizza and I could show them that it was okay to go there, because at that point the kids were now refusing to go. He wouldn't do that either. He called it the "prison cell".

One day soon after he ended contact with her in his effort to be transparent...one of the things he did was to bring me a key to his apartment on top of a few other things he did....I didn't give him a key until he moved back home though about a month and half later.....he never asked for it and I had told him the new garage code.

Anyway I digress as usual but what I am saying is don't let him have privy to things in your life that you are not privy to in his. Please get the point across in a non threatening way though.

Also, I am going to challenge you to a 180 for the week. I don't want you to initiate any hugs this week. See if he does the initiating. Now, it may take a few days or a week for him to notice but just see..... What do you think about the challenge? Now if he does the initiating please hug away. When I stopped initiating them with my H I went for weeks without one but you know what he started back initiating.....he had to miss it.