Honestly, I haven't put much thought into this. My intention is to remain married to my spouse, for life, because I take my marriage vows as sacrosant and indissoluable. But if I did lose my wife, for whatever reason, I would probably give up on women, entirely. Honestly, I have practically had it with women - with the manipulation, exploitation, humiliation, etc.
If I had to start all over again, I would probably just become a celebate, committed single. I would support my 2 children in whatever way I can. One is age 17 and the other 15, so they are not far off from adulthood. I would probably work my job, which I despise, until they were adults. Then I would probably start from scratch.
Start "putting thought" into it. Now. A lot. You are enmeshed in a passionless marriage. Neither you nor it will get better by you repeating the same thing year after year.
"I take my marriage vows as sacrosant and indissoluable." Really? Does your wife? Has she stuck to her marriage vows? The Bible has a lot to say about the physical passionate side of marriage. No religion that I'm aware of requires a couple to stay married no matter what, no matter how unhappy they are. Get real.
"I have practically had it with women - with the manipulation, exploitation, humiliation, etc." I understand your pain, believe me. But... a woman can only be as manipulative, exploitative and humiliating as her husband permits. You have not set her any effective boundaries.
"If I had to start all over again, I would probably just become a celibate, committed single." I mean this in the kindest possible way - but this just reeks of self-pity. Stop it. Of course you want to be feel alive and in a warm and loving marriage. That's why you're here. (And on a side-note, according to the earliest versions of the gospels, the word is "celebrate" not "celibate" - it was unfortunately mistranslated - hence for centuries now priests and monks have gone without sex for no good reason at all )
"my job, which I despise" So do something about it.
"Then I would probably start from scratch." And what I suggest to you - very strongly - is that you "start yourself from scratch" without getting divorced. Give the plan 12 months and see what effects it has on the dynamics of your marriage.
Quote:
I positively detest the job I work today. I mean, I really, really hate it. I do it to pick up a paycheck, in order to keep my wife in the extravagant lifestyle that she enjoys. I have given up several career opportunities at my wife's insistence. She wants a steady source of income, so she can spend all the money she wants.
I repeat, you are a nice guy. Get no more mr nice guy by robert glover. Today.
S&A
"A man can be destroyed but not defeated" - from The Old Man and the Sea, by Ernest Hemingway.
Which I take to mean that every man has within him a spirit of relentlessness and optimism. Its already there; he just has to cultivate it.
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