I agree with Kat, forgiveness is for you. The anger and negative feelings you have will hurt you, so good to work on them for your sake.

Brokenhearted posted this really great post about LRT on my thread (page 4 I think), and here's part of it: It's when you realize that your partner is a flesh and blood human being, that they have their own faults, doubts, demons, and fears, just the same as you. When you can begin to let go of trying to control the way they think and feel. When you learn to let them "own" their thoughts and feelings without assuming that YOU are responsible for, or have control over, those thoughts and feelings. When you can not necessarily "understand" them, but truly "accept" them.

It's when you can learn to be humble enough to admit that maybe this really ISN'T all about you, and you can stop taking all of your partner's actions and moods personally. When you can let them talk to you, vent their anger, thoughts, and feelings to you, without you feeling that it's all your fault, and that you can "fix" it, and that you can make it all better. Or that they really WANT you to make it all better. Or, that you even have the power to do that.
I've been working on forgiving myself, both trying to accept H's many, many flaws \:\) and also praying each day for him to be healed. I find that praying for someone and praying for help in forgiving and not having anger helps a bit, too. Maybe harder to be angry at someone you're praying for I don't know. ((((Lyn)))) Karen

Me 53
D18, S24