I got lost but look what I found.

[iamlost]

Thanks for being so kind, guys. You're probably being too kind, but I appreciate it nonetheless.

I'm a little upset because H reschedule his doc appt. that he was supposed to have yesterday to get referrals to specialists. Well, not upset--just frustrated that it's not happening faster. I just need to have more patience.

You're right P, I don't feel centered AT ALL. I have a lot of thoughts and feelings running through my head and heart--all of them conflicted. I love my husband, we are going to be filing for divorce at some point in the very near future, and I'm kind of OK with that. But, I have no idea what to do now. I'm just trying to take every day as it comes, but every night I come home to an empty apartment. It's messing me up, this loneliness. I'm trying to just sit with it, suffer with it, but I'm cracking. I've been learning these last months how to be a better person & really love someone...

and there's no one there when I get home to love.

So, then I'm making stupid choices because I just want to be close to someone. I feel like I take two steps forward, one step back in my progress. I just have a lot more quiet thinking to do.

OK, enough of that, I need to visit y'alls threads and catch up a bit...