Sorry I've been MIA a bit this week- seem to have been pretty busy, which is good and bad!
Originally Posted By: Beth83
H gets whatever he wants with me.
I read this and wondered if you think it might be worth putting some boundaries in place then? I don't think H should get whatever he wants from you all the time- he should know what's acceptable and what's not (assuming you have some boundaries you want to put in place, of course)
Originally Posted By: Beth83
I feel like saying to H, "HELLO?! Maybe you LOVE ME?!"
I was ROTFLMAO at this- I know EXACTLY how this feels, I actually think I even wrote it on my thread a few weeks ago! It's great that H is getting some therapy now though- a really good sign. I hope it's helping him; have you asked about it, or is he volunteering info?
Also very interesting that the Horse cheated on him and that H's eyes are being opened to her behaviour. One thing I would say, though, is not to reinforce anything about their R to him- just let him take the lead on conversations and validate whatever he says. At this stage I'd imagine he's in mourning for the R. hugely aggravating considering we can see the R was pants, but I'd imagine he can't quite yet (although it DOES sound like he's getting there). Would putting boundaries in place/showing H your strength at all help here?
I can totally relate to the feelings you outlined (1 and 2). I wish I knew the answers. Maybe making a list of the positive things about H might trigger some loving feelings? Passionate marriage might also help- I know T swears by it! I also wish I could offer advice on splitting stuff up, but sadly I can't as I still have 75% of H's stuff here. Maybe someone else will chime in with some advice though.....could you get packers in? (Probably a totally stupid suggestion, but best I can come up with, sorry!)
Hope your weekend is super-fun and fab Beth!! I missed you- it's nice to exchange posts and advice again; so many similarities for us, although you're so much further ahead of me on all fronts!!
