WAW: Watching & Waiting (part deux)

[Bridgestone]

Bridge....you probably know this but I think your counsellor is doing the right thing at the moment in seeing you both separately.

I know.. I tried to tell H that WAAAYY back when I first was seeing my IC. He threw a fit and we went together, then he backed out once the MC started in on his anger issues during joint MC. This seems to be a pattern with him, he wants to fix the R, but not by changing the things the C's tell him need fixing. And when they go down that path with him, he balks.

I know from my experiences and reading that when abuse is involved (and the counsellor obviously knows this) it is better to see the couple individually.

I agree... I think we're just to the point where we need some positives tools, actions, to keep the hope of moving this healing forward.. and we both see going to IC ONLY for 3 weeks as a back step. I think we are both losing confidence in this C. Forrest thinks H has not liked him from the get-go, but he has continued to go because he loves me.

Also, obviously, you are there in the sitch and I am not but I think some individual counselling is well in order for both of you, particularly him, and really, would your h actively seek and go to a new counsellor?

I don't know... he asked me what I thought the MC was doing, when I told him, he was ridiculed it (that our MC, was giving each of us (more likely H - since I am already in IC) some IC).

I still get the impression H doesn't think he needs it... or if he does, he'll get it once the R is healed & we are back together.

Thanks for stopping by and for the drive by noogies
hugs
Bridge