He said it just happened, no big deal.

[Lyn]

Hi all, THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU! It means so much to hear all your words of advice. W2H I like the "ouch" solution. I'm going to try that immediately! He actually came upstairs right after I posted my rant on the 20th and apologized and wanted to see if there was anything he could do to help. We have been going to C and I've been going to IC but they are NOT helping. I think they are making it worse. The C for us is focusing on his poor pitiful life and what caused him to cheat and there has been no talk about him taking responsibility and very little about how to make amends or whatever needs to be done to make our R work. Not to mention the incredible financial drain this has been. I've decided to dump my IC maybe I will find a different one. Last time I saw her I asked for guidance and help and she said, and I quote "Oh no I'm just here to listen" WTF! ! My friends listen for FREE. I'm reading "Divorce Remedy" again and think that will help a lot more now.

To respond to Puppy he supposedly has broken it off with OW and wants to work out our R, this week. This is after he was working on it (giving me a chance) from late March to Mid July, then at the end of July he said he definitely didn't love me and he wanted a D. (This happened after I returned from visiting a dieing relative) He said life was so great when I was gone that he was completely SURE it was over. I was truly relieved and said fine, we did this in front of the C and he was supposed to move out 4 weeks later. Every week that went by he found new reasons to NOT move and for me to move out (he travels 75% of the time at LEAST). Then I went away for a few days mid Aug since he was only to live in the house for a few more days and basically I took a ME break and he had quality time with the kids. When I came back he miraculously had a renewed love for me, said he never ACTUALLY said he didn't love me (YES HE DID) and wants to stay together.

I really wanted to keep our marriage together those first few months. But now I just don't know how I will get past the affair and the way he treated me the months from the time I found out. I do have a lot of anger. Maybe that's just part of the process. I just feel like I'm in limbo and it really sucks.