the texting has continued quite a bit, lots about the computer but that issues has finally been solved with Mac coming through on the repairs. then she took in the car in for an oil change and got had (although she does not know it) they talked her into a bunch of crap and more money issues. I just listened a lot, did not offer any help or advice just listened I did tell her that she knows she when it come down to it she won't starve so quite stressing over money.
we have been talking a lot about my work. lots of things going on these days some good some bad, I have been texting her pretty much everything interesting like I use to and she has been responding to all of it. Last night our mighty BEAVERS took down USC and i was stuck in the jet the entire time but she made sure I had text updates of the highlights.
it is confusing but I have zero expectations and even less hope so I just take it for what it is and have fun chatting with her when I can. I did look at punching bags and may get on this weekend because I do have a lot of pent up anger. right now its coming out in early morning dreams that are leaving my first few awake hours rough, but I want to make sure it does not pop up any other place.
I have not seen her in over a month since our crappy anniversary, and have been toying with the idea of asking her to dinner, but ever time I put the phone down and never call because in the moment I just don't want to see her or hear her say no. I am going out of town in a few weeks and before that I may offer or she if she wants to watch my dog while i am gone. I know how stressed with school she is too and don't want to add to that or be blamed for any of it so another reason to avoid her.
"life's and dance, you learn as you go" I have no idea where I am going or what I want out of life but I am starting to dance again anyways just to see where it takes me.
Me 27, W26 T-12 M-4 SEP 4/29/08 Holding 250 miles Awaiting Support Current
