So he knows I needed him I think it came down to the fact I wasn't showing him as much respect the last few years... controlling too much with the kids etc.
OK, that's crap! Nobody is perfect in a marriage, and I think we like to think if we had only done X then our marriage would have been ok, and think we have more control over it than we really have. Your H wasn't perfect either, you know. Yeah, it's good to work on our 180s and work on ourselves, but ultimately nobody is perfect and I think a lot of these WAS are just looking for happiness in OP instead of themselves which is a problem, going through MLC, depression or whatever. Not about you at all.
OK, I have come slowly, very slowly to agreeing with Saffie's views also, and I think many of us do. However, I do think that sometimes you aren't strong enough, or at least I wasn't to do that right away. Yes, I should have kicked my H out instead of letting him do the slow withdrawal, but I didn't. I think I needed to GAL and 180 and work on myself to where I am stronger now and wouldn't let him get away with all the crap I did, at least I'd like to think I wouldn't. But I was a total marshmallow when I got here and zero self-esteem, so I think you have to work on that to get really strong and be able to do what is good for you. Karen
