Q&A with the WAS

[christarn]

D~

Yes, I believed everything would be perfect...I didn't care what H thought, or about his life. however, it didn't really work out that way. Once I was on my own REALITY set in quickly, no one to help with ANYTHING!! WAKE UP CALL!!! No one to lay in bed with at night, no one to talk to when I was lonely, no one to eat dinner with, no one to call on my way home from work...etc.

You're not cruel, you are curious! Keep in mind, when I walked, I was severely depressed, and had lost both my parents (within a 3-5 time frame) since leaving I have been diagnosed with a form of mild manic-depression, which I think played a huge role in my walking out. I will NEVER make excuses for what I did, it was wrong, and totally went against everything I vowed to my H. I just would do anything now, to work it out....I just need him to "see" now that I am back to the "old me" things can be different. ok, sorry..back to your ?'s!! When I walked, all I could think about is a stress free life, nobody to help me make decisions, no body to tell me how i should spend my pay checks, nobody to tell me anything...and he had spent an evening with his Ex-GF, which put the icing on the cake...so I WA. The day he found out, I felt extremely guilty, cried most of the day, I called him, told him what I had done....he already knew; the neighbors called and told him. We tried MC, I received the phone bill, he was talking to Ex-GF while we were in MC...then I went off the deep end and filed for D...that was a very huge mistake....hind sight is always 20/20! I would change a lot of the things I did if I could go back, unfortunately, I can only learn from my mistakes, and keep praying that my M will work out.

Hope this helped
christarn