Hi TxMom, I am struggling with disclosure also. My H is having an A with one of his direct reports. As you know he won't admit it, he has only told me he cheated because if it is disclosed at work they both would be fired. He is moving out 10/1 to a furnished apt. I think that if OW did not work for him he would move in there. We are telling our Ds tonight. If either of them asks if H is "going out with someone", I am going to say you have to ask Daddy. If he lies I will tell them "Daddy has cheated". As far as work we are not going to say anything for the next few months. In one way it is good because I do not want to deal with the gossip of co-workers since we work together. In another I don't to give him cover to carry on his A. Tough call.

If you had a good friend that you could trust going to the sales rep meeting, then you can let them expose it. What you have going for you is that the OW is only 25 and H is 40 with 2 very small children. 25 year olds do not want to deal with baggage and are very much into the moment. This A does not have a good chance of lasting. Also one of the people on T2L thread found on either My Space or FACE book the web page for the OW. She lists all kind of stuff about the A because they are young and stupid. Good chance there might be something up -- investigate. My H OW is turning 51 Saturday and has had plastic surgery and a good body. I would be more relived if H was going out with a much younger woman. This OW wants to get her hooks into my H because he is a manager and makes good money. This started off as emotional affair and grew physical while my D and I were visiting family for 2 weeks during the summer. All the signs were there of a MLC and I missed them.

So glad you are going out. I cried rivers. I have good days and bad days. The next week will be awful but I will do my best to continue to work on myself. I need to be there for my Ds. I tell you without these threads I would be a huge mess. There is so much encouragement and good advice it does help. take care.
Also just to let you know I am in TX also - Corpus

Me 53
H 50
D16, D29
M 22 years
bomb 7/08 INH - alien pod replaces H
8/08 - OW (direct report), I work there also
bomb II - H moves 10/1
expose ow 10/22
D to be final 9-09