In terms of finances, you all know my story. Bankruptcy, car repossession, all of it. I have enough trouble paying my rent.
But I look at things this way: I have already lost one of the most important people in my life. I hope to God I get a second chance. The rest is inconsequential.
I agree, put the IM on away. If you can, shut it down. I know that since we are hurting the initial instinct is to take any crumb we can right now. But sometimes we have to pull back just a bit to gain some perspective.
I am telling you what worked for me. It was hard. I went one week without contacting at all. That was one of the longest weeks of my life and I hated every minute of it. But in the end, giving that space was a huge icebreaker. I think that it is giving the WAS time to reassess the sitch makes it so much easier to deal with.
I was scared, scared that H wouldn't call. Scared he wouldn't respond. But several people told me to be patient. He would. And he did.
I am telling you the same thing. You have to let go a little. It has nothing to do with you, at this moment it has to do with him. Letting go helps you to feel more strong and secure in yourself. It helps your self esteem. Doing it on your own is hard, probably one of the hardest things you will ever do. But it can be done. And in the long run, you find strength you never knew you had. That in itself will determine how the rest of this goes. Strength is very attractive.
Would you rather be around a happy, self secured individual or a needy individual? Showing them that you don't have to rely on them for YOUR happiness is a key.
Im still standin better than I ever did looking like a true survivor feeling like a little kid Im still standin after all this time and Im picking up the pieces of my life without you on my mind..
