New Thread-Husband Moved in With OW(T2L)

[hope3343]

Hello all, T2L -- guess what Bleeding love is my song also right now -- think we should start a new thread titled that??

Marisol, glad you had a good weekend -- wish I could get away and I am thinking about it. your back take one day at a time and keep GAL

TxMom, My H started all this in July, I am still very much in shock. I have been DBing on and off -- some days I fall flat but have been consistent these last 4 days and I know H is confused. H is in all this drama of moving out and I am just doing my thing and chatting nicely, making dinner, making plans and H does not know what to think of it.

It is going to be a bad night though. H called me just now to tell me that he is telling our Ds tonight that he is moving out next week. I said whatever you feel is right. But I did screw up a few times in the conversation. I said to H, whoever is giving you this advise about Atty and Mediators (OW of course), did you ask them how their kids did without their father and what kind of relationship does their kids have with them now (I hear her daughters do not see their father), H got mad and said "why do you think there is OW -- "I am just not happy" (liar liar pants on fire) --
so I stepped back to DB and said your right we are not to talk about this we are talking about what is best for your daughters. I know how difficult this will be because you are a good father (subjective). H said he appreciated me saying that. Then off of DBing I asked are you sure this is what you want to do...and he says I already have a lease - so stupid me says leases are made to be broken. H said I need to take care of myself, I need to make my own decisions. I said you are right I agree, you let me take care of everything and I was not happy with that either - turned to back to him.
H then says I notice some changes in you lately -- you have more confidence, you are getting out more and losing weight. I said well I need to do things for myself because I never want to go back to that person I was. I am keeping an open mind on this. I then asked H "I hope you keep an open mind too because you could really change from this also." I then told H you really need to grow also, because if we change our minds I never want to go back to that horrible way of our marriage again. I want you to be enpowered. I am tired of taking care of you. H was stunned and quiet.

Then H mentions he needs a break from work and wants to get away. I said take me to Las Vegas that is the least you owe me. That threw H..he says right we are seperating and you want to go to Las Vegas. So I said so what I could use a break too. No comment. I think he must be planning a weekend with OW to San Antonio..her daughter is getting married on Oct 12 so I am sure she would like a weekend away.

Then before I hang up I mention I have to find a costume for a halloween party that both of us were invited to on Oct 18. So H says well we should maybe go together otherwise everyone at work will be saying -- where's H, where's H???? So I said that would be fine we could at least have a laugh together. (we are not telling anyone at work for a few months -- except OW knowing)

Well everyone please says some prayers for my daughters tonight. I am so worried about this. I am mad at H for putting them through this pain. Still can't believe it. I am making a list of goals over the weekend on what I want to do to the house redecorating and rearranging to keep busy for while. We have this king size bed that we bought last year because H wanted the largest size and now he is leaving and it upsets me everynight when I go to sleep. I hope his new furnished apt the bed is lumpy and smells.
Thanks everyone for letting me vent. I am starting to freak out. deep breaths.