Working on believing in miracles

[istherehope]

Hi Jen,

I'd go back to the US. We have pets in Dublin though and a lease through June so I can't back out on my commitments.

I am so torn. I could take a leave without pay and go away for a little while, but I feel like the adult thing to do is to try and be in the same city as H for a few months as he has said he wants to meet etc. Who knows if he actually does, but it is probably the only chance that we have. It's just that if he isn't through this thing by June, then I think he'll want to end it as that is when our lease is up. Neither of us wants to stay in Dublin past then really.

Ugh. I am not chatting with him anymore either. He IMd me first and I did ask if he ever got these books I sent him and he said no that it was a bad idea to send things to the house as then he has to pick them up at the post office. What a jerk. It was a gift and now he's angry about that too.

OK not going to say another word to him. I don't feel like I love this H anymore either. I am just sad to see our life get torn apart now.

ITH