Ok first off, those are some pretty bad self help books if they suggest that YOU are not making him happy as someone else can't make you happy if you are not happy with yourself.
Yes, your H seems to be reading from my H script too. "I'm not happy", "I need to think about my happiness right now", "Maybe we're not meant to be married". I heard so many different reasons for why he was leaving and many contradicted with each other too.
I personally don't think you should give up. At times like this it sure does feel easier too but you need to decide if your marriage is worth it to you. Hang in there.
I agree you need to stop chatting with him for today sign off of IM or put it where it says yr off. Go clear your head do what ever you need to, to calm down.
