This definitely is a very emotional time for me, but I'm hanging on. Regarding what my ex said on the phone, unfortunately I think it is because she feels comfortable around me (which is a good thing I suppose), but I really do feel that she has no feelings for me whatsoever at this point. But you are right - I can't allow myself to second guess feelings.
This morning she called me up and asked me if I would bring her tacos for breakfast on my way to work. I did and dropped our daughter off at daycare. Later that evening I had dinner with her and her best friend. They had been looking at houses earlier and found a loft that they are going to put an offer up tomorrow. I was upbeat and supportive, and gave then some advice on how to negotiate/see the deal through. However, driving home I cried like a baby, but got my act back together once I arrived home.
The thing is, I wish sometimes I could go cold turkey so to speak and not speak/see my ex for a good week or so. I feel like I am too emotionally attached to her right now and just talking to her sometimes brings back a lot of memories/hurt of what I've lost. Right now I am picking up my daughter from daycare after work everyday so I do see my ex a lot. We also go out to dinner about twice a week or go run errands. Those are all good things and I definitely want to continue to make progress. I do maximize the time I am with her, staying positive and acting as if I have my stuff together even though inside I'm hurting. I just wish I could avoid her completely for a while until my emotions are in better control, but that wouldn't be fair to my daughter and I don't want to sabotage the progress we have made so far . I guess I have to keep faking it till I make it so to speak. I am really glad for this forum as it allows me to vent.
Breton39, how are you doing? Haven't heard from you in a while. Hope things are going well
Last edited by lovenomatterwhat; 09/24/0803:35 AM.
