Hi Sabrina, my H is also in an A with OW who works for him. He is moving out next week (what he wants). In my case, I let him know that I know of the A, which H denies vehemently (since she works for him he knows that they both can get fired), also I work there also and even though OW works in other building our paths cross. So as far as the A, I cannot ask it to stop since he wants to move because "he is not happy" and has not been happy for 21 years. With that said the only solution that is available to myself is to work on me. I am keeping the conversation pleasant at home till he leaves. (not always successful but working on it), if he says he is going out I tell him "have a good time". When he comes home late (one night at 4 am) I don't say anything. When he came home that late one night he said to me, I am surprised that you were not calling me 24/7. I said why would I do that? It kept him wondering. That is what we want. Not to see us as they perceive us to be (nagging, controlling etc), but to change that view. Do I get upset??? Yes, sometimes I take walks on the beach and rage, scream and cry and try to get it out of my system. But I am trying to keep working on it alone till he comes out of the MLC fog.
Me 53 H 50 D16, D29 M 22 years bomb 7/08 INH - alien pod replaces H 8/08 - OW (direct report), I work there also bomb II - H moves 10/1 expose ow 10/22 D to be final 9-09
