I don't know if this will work for you, but it has sure helped me when I am feeling the anger, hurt or frustration.
First you need to realize that the major changes in the attitude towards you will not change overnight. With that being said I instituted a key word with my husband when he reverts back to saying or doing something thoughtless, we use "ouch". Instead of having to take a walk or calm down, I just say "ouch" and then he knows that what was just said or took place bothered me. It is really working, we are able to go back and discuss what was said or done later on when we are both calm and more importantly he immediately recognizes his negative words or behavior and he can consciously stop them. Since we started this about a month ago, his negative comments have decreased dramtically.
