Warning-- do NOT watch Cheaters if your spouse appears to be blowing you off by being "sick".
UGH!
Watching that show only convinced me that I would be a total idiot to NOT think he's seeing someone else.
I've read in the DB forums that we shouldn't care if our spouse is cheating (per se); that we should 'make ourselves the better option', work on ourselves, etc. Well, that's all well and good- EXCEPT if you are sleeping with your spouse, I think that we LBSs have every RIGHT to know if they're cheating.
OTOH-What if I am wrong? What if he really IS sick? What if he ISN'T seeing someone else and then I cut him off for what is no good reason?
Me-43 H-46 M 12 yrs 7/09 T 15 2 grown kids bomb 7/05/07 H moved out 8/04/07 11/22/09 told him I quit;let's get ball rolling Mid Dec- he isn't sure he wants D End 2/2010-Starting to consider piecing
And the moral of the story is..... it's always good to speak with the person who is sick.
He sent me a text asking what I was doing. I said nothing in particular He asked if he could come over I said maybe He ok I said ok what? and then my phone rang. And he sounded like crap.
He asked why the "maybe" and and I said because he has been incommunicado all week long and he said "I've been SICK" and then started hacking. And it wasn't a fake hack. Whoops.
I still feel like things aren't going so well, but at least he really WAS sick. And now I feel bad for not believing him.
Me-43 H-46 M 12 yrs 7/09 T 15 2 grown kids bomb 7/05/07 H moved out 8/04/07 11/22/09 told him I quit;let's get ball rolling Mid Dec- he isn't sure he wants D End 2/2010-Starting to consider piecing
Hey Tostada- No, I haven't shown him the article; I have verbally referenced it in passing.
I might have been able to get some traction with it in the past, but now, I think it would just come off as pressure.
I think that most WASs feel like they are 'the exception' and that studies, percentages, etc would NEVER apply to them.
I WISH I could just show him the article and have a lightbulb go off for him...
Me-43 H-46 M 12 yrs 7/09 T 15 2 grown kids bomb 7/05/07 H moved out 8/04/07 11/22/09 told him I quit;let's get ball rolling Mid Dec- he isn't sure he wants D End 2/2010-Starting to consider piecing
Hey CW- I saw your post-- I actually don't think it's as bad as you think. I'm getting too tired to comment now; I'll come back tomorrow and comment. Don't worry; get some rest. Tomorrow's a new day.
Me-43 H-46 M 12 yrs 7/09 T 15 2 grown kids bomb 7/05/07 H moved out 8/04/07 11/22/09 told him I quit;let's get ball rolling Mid Dec- he isn't sure he wants D End 2/2010-Starting to consider piecing
Me 35, H 38; Together 13.5 yrs, M 7 Bomb 1 10/07/06 Sep'd 1/14/07 - 4/15 Piecing: 4/07 - 9/07 Bomb 3 10/11/07: Never loved you, let's separate 2/08 slowly improving 7/08 Piecing (7/25/08 rings back on!!) Current thread
