He, ultimately will have to decide to leave her and come to you. Make him see what he will lose...does he realize how this affects the family? Probably not....He is in the "affair fog" that clouds all of his thoughts. He is not thinking rationally. There are many things you can do. You can do 180s and "Get a life" by doing things that make you happy which ultimately makes you more attractive to him. You COULD expose the affair to make reality hit him rather than the fantasy he is in right now. You could go totally dark on him and let him spend this time with this 25 year old so he sees what he has gotten himself into, meanwhile you are out on your own having the life he thought he didn't want.
I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. You have such young children.
