Help me Act AS IF, Part 7: The Separation

[newnamenewlife]

H is moving out for real on October 1. For the past three months, he had a furnished sublet. Now he's going to be taking a few pieces of furniture, books, etc--some of the stuff we bought together and have lived with together for over 17 years.

Am I supposed to find this easier than I do? I have been crying and crying. H just plows ahead with his plan, showing no emotion, no sorrow at what he's done--just a sense of entitlement, like it's his birthright to do this.

The other night, my D7 started sobbing about how she doesn't like having us separated. She was clutching the box with my wedding and engagement rings, and wanted to sleep with them. I had to pry them out of her hands. She called H, sobbing. I asked him about it the next day and he coldly said: "I can't let a 7 year old tell me what to do."

I keep trying to take the focus off him, to GAL more than I do (which is a lot). I am just dreading this final moving out--which is just two days after my 45th birthday. He initially moved out 4 days before our anniversary (and didn't acknowledge the day with even a sentence) and now this. It's just so painful.

And then he talks about his new apt as if I'm supposed to be pleased for him, maybe even going out to buy him a housewarming gift.

I hope after he moves, I can finally start to move forward myself. It's been such a horrible year.