Thuggy, I am going to shake my diluted head from side to side and see what comes out only because you have added and provided SOOOO much on my gasping thread. (hence no promises of divine wisdom here)
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i have a firm belief a battle worth fighting for
and
the other person says they share that but are not showin git in actions
everytime i try to bring this up i am told i am testing our friendship
Life tests each and every ones friendships daily. I have never understood this statement except for the fact that it always puts one on the defensive. All problems or disagreements survive and grow off darkness. When mouths are closed, darkness and suspicions grow. Clarity is the only ointment.
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they get really defensive when i call them on it...when i question their actions
i am told that i am sayign oen thing and then another, which i don't feel but maybe i am
how do you resolve this sort of thing
in the past i would suck it up and hold it in or cut and run from the friendship
Often times I find myself on the other side of this equation because I must have real problems in the cognitive area but what helps me with this conflict is knowing that I have to acheive clarity so if all avenues have been exhausted by trying to sift through all the details with the other individual go without resolution, then I say "How bout we sit on this for a couple of days and think about it and then we can talk about it with maybe some sort of resolution. I would hate to see anything like this stand in our way of our friendship" That being said, my success rate (especially in my M)is about 50/50. Not great odds but something. I try to live by the rule that I don't know everything nor does the other person in front of me know everything. Then I have a pint of beer, mumble to a Replacements song and strum a few strings away from everyone. Of course I come back to hurt feelings but I feel a little more clear headed. So there you are....fragments of thought from my diluted head. I hope it helps figgy...peace on the pathways
