The waiting game......I made my H do the same thing....It's good to read your feelings because it makes me face very clearly what I did to him. I ask H for forgiveness often, as he does with me. We are in a good place now, but it took long to get here. If you can wait you may be better than ever. Keep remembering that. You took your vows seriously and that should be commended. Do you have married friends that support you at home?