I'll tell you what bothers me. What bothers me is how varied are personal standards of integrity. I'm not talking about my wife here, because I know her so well, I can almost understand how she has ended up here.
It's the other men that I don't understand. Are they so hard up and their integrity so low that it doesn't bother them at all to be involved with a married woman? I just don't understand it at all.
Bugs me to Dan, not just people that get involved with a married person, but it's hard finding anyone who isn't ready to tell you to throw your marriage in the trash the first instant anything goes wrong (sure it might be a different story if it were their own marriage). I think it comes down to people thinking the marriage is the relationship, leading to the idea that if the relationship goes wrong then marriage is by default over (which I'm pretty sure is the rational that OMs and OWs would provide). If that were the case there would be no point in get married at all, it must be something more and it is. It says you will make every effort to make that relationship the best it can be. I think you can walk away at peace if you have made every effort, but it seems there are few that do, but thankfully these boards are full of those few.
I think taking a tougher stance shows you value marriage highly and to you isn't something cheap and throw away.
