Feeling sorry for them - that was the feeling I had in Divorce Care last week.
Did they have the intensity of the pain that I experienced? Was it the same, similar, or even half that? Because I am truly surprised that I lived through it. If he felt anything like that at all.......it is hard to fathom someone being in that torment and not having anyone around him see it.
But I have to take his word for it - he felt that he was in "misery." So I am sorry for what he went through, and how alone he must of felt. But I also feel sorry for what lies ahead for him; I don't think he's seen suffering, yet. Maybe he will just live the rest of his life this way, rather than go through that, who knows? But I do know that there is no one who can help him, even though I had thought that those trials were to be shared, once upon a time.
As far as having compassion for the other woman? I don't feel a need to. I'd rather consider her a non-entity, as if she didn't exist. I just don't want her to influence or affect my kids negatively......
I like NoCode's metaphor of celestial bodies about this concept. And it can all happen on the subconscious level. In the end, it just doesn't matter.
