I really appreciate your thoughts. That are a comfort. My vows are important to me as well. That's probably why the betrayal hurts the way it does. The thing is, the betrayal is in many ways the smallest thing. I get angry about that. I get more angry when I think about the lies she told me straight to my face. I get most angry when I think about how she uses me for money, how she strung me along for months in MC, how because of her own selfishness and fear she has kept me floating in limbo while my heart was dying and I was struggling at times to keep breathing and all that while, she was living it up.
No, I'm going to have to bring this situation to the light of day soon, else the anger will start to be a problem. Thinking after, I think that this afternoon was a little bit of a panic attack.
