You suggested a cold shower over on my thread but you forgot to tell me when and where.
"Fear is the mind-killer" Muad'Dib Me 53, XW 44, DD 14, DS 12 Bomb and OM 12/15/06 Separated 01/02/07 Divorced 05/13/08 X married OM(OMH) 08/2009 Married 06/09/13
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
Since my mother's passing, I have not seen hide or hair of my ex.
Can we say guilt
He avoids me at all possible costs
When he drops the kids off he is already in the car when the kids enter the door
He has my son pick up the girls
Withdrawal?
Depression?
Where am I at? I have never been better. I have a good perspective on the situation. I see it for what it is. I take responsibility for my part of the marriage falling apart. However, I realize now it was quite fixable. Our problems were blown up by his crisis. He wanted there to be a problem to justify his lust. My finances are good. I am saving money. He says he is broke and miserable. My kids see me functioning as a normal responsible woman. My kids see him miserable, with bouts of anger, depression, and periods where he tries to run away from all his problems. My kids see me laugh and cry. I have lost so much, but gained so much wisdom. I have my integrity. He does not. I have discovered my true friends, those with character and who are willing to take a stand for what is right and wrong. He has his bimbo..... All of you on this board have been amazing. I have such deep respect for all of you. Who knows why we are going through this. I just know that I have all intent of making a wonderful thing out of a horrible situation. No matter what happens now in my sitch, I know I will be ok.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
Trusting, You say you are doing better, and I am glad if that is how you are feeling, but the tone of your post strikes me as rather...something. I am not sure what.
Angry? You still seem to be blaming.
M: 16 years Bomb 4/07 OW 20s long gone Divorced 11/09 I remarried New Guy Cooperative r w/X regarding D
The tone you are picking up on is not anger. It is pure and total detachment. Part of me feels that I may not want my ex back. It scares me I guess. Many say this is a normal response for the stander. I don't know. I guess I should not worry about it unless the time comes.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
I quietly asked him if he had anything else to say
and then hung up......
It was hard to see him in so much pain
He is clearly miserable
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11