Quote: Is there someone else...or the spectre of someone else? Perhaps a muscular fireman in your class?
what exactly are you implying?? there are someone else's everywhere I go...men are attractive...find me attractive..sometimes it's hidden well and sometimes it's not...matters not...has little to do with what's going on here other than perhaps the fact that if h weren't here treating me like I was his mother or sister I could take advantage of such spectre. Or more significantly if h weren't treating me like a mother or sister I wouldn't notice other men as much as I do.
Quote: It's the difference between "being" in an R, and "participating" in an R. Our Ses are the former and we're the later.
exactly!! h "participates" in the r when it's convenient to him (or at least that is the way it seems to me) and I at least try to participate or am willing to participate with more regularity. In other words I put the r first and he seems to put his business, then himself then the kids then the weather, then football, the lawn etc first...where do I fit in? should we just get a maid and a nanny and get rid of me?
