"...I have been sober for 1 month, been working out everyday, wearing nicer clothes, going to church and reading uplifting books, basically coming back to the person I used to be before I relasped..."
These are great things that you're doing, and it appears that she's noticing. However, one thing you have to realize is that she was mentally and emotionally "checked out" of the marriage long before your month of sobriety and self-improvements. As such, it will make no sense for you to overcompensate and rush through dubbed "self-improvements", especially if you're doing it to showboat (which I hope you're not) rather than be genuine about the changes you're making for yourself.
First bit of advice: don't panic...breathe...calm down...collect yourself...
If you haven't read Michele's DR and DB, I'd start with DR first, then move on to DB.
You won't be able to solve this quickly, so dig a deep foxhole and be prepared to be in battle for the next few months...or year...or more. The sooner you realize that this will be a long and arduous journey, the better you'll be able to bust this impending D.
Oh! Another bit of advice - if at all possible, before you act or react to your WAW in whatever sitch you find yourself in, I'd recommend checking in with fellow DB'ers here on the boards first...at least for the first few weeks of DB'ing until you're more in control of your emotions and are detached enough from your WAW to objectively measure your actions.
Keep posting here (or in Newcomers section), fill us in on your back-story, and keep us aprised of ongoing developments. So many great people here who've been there, done that, and done it all over again!
- Me = 32 y/o - WAW = 32 y/o - M = 2.5 yrs, T = 12.5 yrs - No kids - Bomb, WAW moved out, D filed = 8/15/08
