(Sorry, Donna, I was practically falling asleep when I submitted the last post.)
DivorceCare (DC) is usually just a 13-week program and that's it. The church I attended DC was a bit different as they keep DC rolling year-round, such that if you started in the middle o the 13-week program you could pick up the other sessions after Week 13 when it rebegan with Week 1 again. Thus I went through the program twice.
But even given that, our particular group was different. I started when the attendance was very low and watched it build up. We just developed a tight-knit group, contacting each other by phone and email, met at restaurants, had dinner parties at each other's residences, etc. And we even had get-togethers with our children, like going to the museum one time.
When we completed DC, we started another support group as a follow-on. We chose Kay Arthur's book "Lord, Heal My Hurts" and made it into a Bible study. We just concluded that last week and have been trying to come up with the next step.
Seeing how even some of who I would have considered the strongest among us spiritually are still struggling even after all we were supposed to have learned, has been a bit sad and disheartening. Even my dear friend "M", who led our second study/support group has expressed a lot of difficulty with insecurities and doubts and lingering pain from the rejection from her now XH. It has led to some poor decisions she has made even very recently.
I fear that now most of our group is struggling with the difficulties in life and our once tight-knit group is unraveling. So many of us are no longer either willing or able to participate. And I haven't seen some of them in more than a month. "L", for example, has not ever made any of our gatherings or events in close to two months now. We talk to her by email and phone, but she never can quite make any of the face-to-face meetings anymore. It all seemed to happen right when her XH remarried his first W. I worry greatly for her.
Others in our group have also strayed away. And it breaks my heart to see all of us still in pain and struggling -- despite all that we should have learned, despite the love and grace of God.
I know life moves on. And I should know that some friendships are only temporary acquaintances, like different busboys in a restaurant. It doesn't make it any easier.
I guess that's why the medical ordeal I've gone through of late has been pressing on me the desire for the permanence of family.
