ponderings

[holdingon]

Have you read after the affair? And The Road Less Traveled also has a huge chapter on Love. You might want to read it. Yes, he left you (momentarily) for OW because it was exciting, convenient, etc. But that is not LOVE. I know he said he loved her. He meant he was lusting after her. She was pushing every wonderful button he had. Love is looking out for the other person, wanting them to grow, caring for them. Lusting is a very selfish thing. IF she loved your H, she would not have let him put this dark hole in his life. You are the one that truly loves him, by being there with him, caring for him, taking care of the kids, etc. NO, not nearly as fun, certainly.

Read what love really is in the Bible in 1 Corinthians. Remember it doesn't keep a list of wrongs... But DO NOT go to the place where you even THINK that OW is deserving of your H. Never again. You certainly deserve more than that. Go back and read your posts, especially the one where you went to Newcomers to give everyone hope. It gave me hope. Keep hoping, keep the faith, and EXPECT good things to happen. (And hey, just because my R is so in the toilet it's already at the septic tank, doesn't mean you don't have to listen to me!!)