Hi 'L', waiting for Saturday is torture. I feel that I was thrown under the bus by 'm'. How can she meet him every Monday? How can she lie? Last time, I spoke to him. He doesn't give me anything to hold onto. No more 'talk soon'. No more 'talk to you later'. Why do they both throw me to the wolves on Monday? She used my divorce to get closer to 'A'. They are closer and I am pushed away. Is being closer to me that scarey to him. I feel that I messed up somewhere. My patience is weakening. Hope is weakening. My emotional health is weakening. I have prayed to regain strength. I have prayed for God to give me something to encourage me, to give me hope.
