lwb thanks ! Not focussing on H really, just thought I'd mention this new thing...hope they choke on each other....yikes that was nasty ! Just kidding though, I don't really care what course this is meant to take for them...focussing on my life more now.
Naej, thanks for checking on me !!! You are too sweet ! Aren't dogs just wonderful ! I truly have received more admiration in these 2 days from this 'man' than from any other in the past ...many many years !
I am happy and enjoying this new turn in my life !
HOpe all is well with you !xxx
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
Hi Cinders… I had assumed they already lived together because she is around your children so much…
My question to my H when he asked (ages ago) about son being more involved with OW … how would it benefit son??
Surely their time should be just with their father.
How do you feel about them moving in together?
Nutty.
Be The Greener Grass.
Me 40 H 42 Son 11 Married 15 years. Left May 2006 after gambling spree I had EA August 2006 OW Aug 07 after another gambling spree (she will make me happy - stop me gambling!) I filed for divorce 9th April 2008.
Yes H and ow practically live together....it's just a formality now, she's found a tenant for her appt so they will be moving into H's new house soon.
How do I feel about it?
Well, on the one hand I hate it ! But I also hope this will put more pressure on their relationship. Then again, nothing seems to stop that train ! They are going UP and UP and UP ! It's all great fun and joy and I truly don't even want to go there !
I used to tell my H exactly the same thing, about how it would benefit the kids...but nowadays he just says, 'because she's part of my life and I want the kids to get to know her and love her'....yuck !
You know Nutty, every day that goes by, I realize even more that there is NOTHING I can do about what is going on. It hurts horrible that we never got to work at our marriage, for I believe we really COULD hae been happy !
I have found that I have lost faith, that I pray less...and just live some days. Other days, I believe and hope.
I don't know what God's plan is. It's hard to live that way. It's hard to trust that things will be ok in the end. But I try mostly to think just that.
I have lost H. He left and will not be back.
Life is unfolding a little step at a time...and sometimes I even have to go back a few steps to try again !
Love to you ! xxx
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
Hi Sweety, I have not yet cought up with your thread. Just wanted to say hi and thanks for thinking of me by posting on my thred. Have a lovely day tomorrow. (((HUGS)))
Cinders like you my faith has waned more than it has warmed throughout this journey. I'm really struggling with all that has already come my way and now H wants to take custody of D13 as well. How can God want that for me? I know I am the best mother I can be. Why do I feel like it is me being punished when I have done no wrong as far as my R with H is concerned? I don't expect answers. Nobody has them. I just wanted to let you know you are not alone in how you feel.
Take care
Me 43 XH 45 M 2.7.88 Divorce 7.10.09 Kids D20,S17 & D15
amd, not sure who you are, but I can see you've been around for a long time too, thanks so much for your encouragement. It was much needed and very appreciated !!
Love Cinders xxx
"In the depths of my winter, I realized there is within me an invincible summer" Albert Camus
And yes, all we can do is to ride this out, and let time heal us. Time will heal us. It just takes time.
But in all seriousness, I know exactly what you mean when you say one day you are full of hope and know, just know things will be ok. The next day, despair and anxiety about the situation. I suppose you are right, we are moving forward, even if we have to step backwards a time or two.
Cinders, Remember the law of gravity? Well, what goes up and up and up, must come down, down and down. So, the love birds are moving in together? Well, that's just so nice and once they do and the euphoria has come and gone, the ugly warts and moles will come into play. Time is on your side.
As for your feelings, they are perfectly normal. They will go up and they'll come down. It's the coaster ride! That's why it's very important to just let the birdies be and keep the focus on you, your children and Pluto!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Just kidding though, I don't really care what course this is meant to take for them...focussing on my life more now.