Rocky Mountain High

[Amy M]

Dan,

I know that's tough too...the financial side of things. When, H left, he took a portion of his income with him, but he took a disproportionate amount of our monthly bills. About every 2 weeks he complains that he doesn't have enough money to do things. And, every two weeks, I explain again that neither do I...that he's added a lot to our monthly expenses (by getting separate living arrangements). In some ways, I see that as one of the prices he has to pay for his decision.

However, if you are going to owe more after a D, maybe you are better off leaving it like it is. Try not to think of it as financing your own backstabbing. Try to see it as simply providing support for a wayward family member. I would say, though, that if you've had to lower your standard of living or that of the kids, maybe you should consider giving her a little less. I'd feel differently about my sitch if I was having to make any real sacrifices financially.

And, maybe that will be part of the bluff..."You either come clean or I cut back my financial support..."

Whatever you decide, you'll be okay. It won't be easy, but, you'll be okay!!!

Amy