Thanks for taking the time to post such a thoughtful post... You are very insightful. Sometimes I feel like I am wasting my own time and everyone else's b/c I can't see a path... I have just set it aside and buried myself in some other achievable goal over and over again since my D.
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That said, what are your expectations for a LTR?
Sigh... I don't know anymore...
I was stuck on an island with cancelled activites at a resort that is often referred to as a summer camp for adults. There were many frustrated people that I talked to that asked me that exact same question - especially as they saw me dismiss one person after another...
Maybe it is like the difference between art and pornography - tough to define - but you can tell when you see it... Maybe I will know what I want when I see it... But I am afraid The Block is operating like a blindfold...
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Acceptance of another can be hard and sometimes the bar is set too high.
Let someone else entertain you enough that you want to continue the conversation.
Perhaps that first point is the reason that the second point never happens. I hear the same old tired lines... And they try too hard...
And this will sound conceited...but there are times I feel like yelling can you please see past my appearance and TALK TO ME.
The only men that seem to TALK TO ME are the ones that are not interested in an R with me... So therein lies a paradox...
There was one man at The Resort that I would have considered getting to know - but he violated R (avoidance) rule 1 - he was separated but not D. Or perhaps I think I would have considered dating him b/c I new he failed an R (avoidance) rule... he has to be legally single...
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Do all your experiences need to be packaged?
Well - yes... and indexed, labeled and catalouged!
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Well, I'd bet you're very good at pigeonholing different aspects of your life.
Yes - I am... That is why it is difficult for people to get to know me. Even at work - people are taken aback a little when I pull out all the stops...b/c my capabilities are not always apparent from my demeanor... And there is that part about working in a male dominated environment where you absolutely cannot reveal any aspect of your personal life that in any way gets you labeled as a "woman."
The X commented once on how it was amazing how I could completely turn off the work when I left the office during my M. However, when I turned on the work switch - I needed to focus on work and do not handle disruptions very well.
Indians are brainwashed from birth that education and career are everything - that is why it is so easy for us to hide there.
I really am not a flake. I can think clearly about just about everything else - even under pressure. The Block is my nemesis...
