Mrs. H, I am sorry about your home. Women look at homes a bit differently then men. We are the ones that usually decorate, are home more, and the "nesting" instinct is always there. Men, on the other hand, aren't too much into the decorating, etc. Most are content with the basics and nothing more. I know your home means a lot to you and your sons and I'm just sorry it has to be this way. As for the people coming and going through your home, it's a distraction and now you have to be even more on your toes in keeping the place neat and tidy for perspective buyers.
Your h has been extremely determined not to meet the boundaries set by you, your lawyer and now the judicial system. You are going to have a difficult time w/him for a while when it comes to the boundaries. You cannot soften towards him on this or he will take advantage of your good nature each and every time. He's going to have to learn that when the time is set for a certain for pick ups an drop offs, he's got to adhere to it. The next time he wants to pick them up early, just say JA, the time is already set and you need to adhere to it. Do not engage in any other discussion. Keep it short, simple and to the point. He really does like to push your buttons. You have your hands full with this guy.
Once the anger has died down, I think things will be a bit better. He's at the stage where he's like a very angry kid that is vindictive in all ways. Hopefully he will get through this, but it won't be until everything has been destroyed and you are then on your own. It's a heck of a way to be towards someone for now reason, but that's how their brains function throughout all of this....anger, lashing out, vindictive, button pushing, etc....and they wonder why we don't want anything to do with them when they are like this!
I do hope that school is going well for you. I am hoping that the studies are keeping your mind from straying too much to him. Please take care of yourself and do something special w/the boys today.
Hugs!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
