I think it has helped. I need to do more of it but it is still very hard for me to do those things. But as they say pratice makes perfect. So hopefully things will continue to grow and progress.
It seems to me that her and I have grown up a lot over this very hard time. We seem to be growing together we do a lot more things together and we cheer each other on. I don't think that we take each other for granted nearly as much as before. We still have so much work to do but at least now we are working for a common goal.
Well its been a long time since I have posted. Things seem to be going ok im still staying strong and not trying to be to intimate to often. Lately when I mention it she seems more acceptable to do it. So that is good. I just wish that she would iniate it more. It makes me feel so good when she is the one who iniates the intimacy. If I have to be the one though I will do it.
Just saying hi, Lee. Hope you are contiuing to do well.
Mockers2
"Somehow we survive, and tenderness frustrated does not wither." Dennis Brutus, South African poet
"That which does not kill us makes us stronger."
Friedrich Nietzsche
I really should update more. The last couple of weeks have been fairly rocky. Found out that my W has gall stones and she is having surgery to have the gall bladder removed later this month. which has caused her to be very grumpy for the last couple of weeks. So I have been trying to lay low.
We also found out that her thyroid isn't doing everything what it is supposed to do so she is now on meds for her Thyroid.
I am wondering have any of you had problems with the thyroid and if you have did getting on meds help out much with that. Will that maybe help with the good old sex drive?
I think over the last couple of weeks I have been moody while she was being moody so that didn't help much. I just wish some times im better prepared for these things. It would have helped a lot if I would have been in the right frame of mind. I have been doing pretty good though things in the bed room are still very slow and it doesn't look to be picking up. I swear I have tried change things that just seem to have the same problem.
I have had my thyroid gland removed and after the surgery they don't put you on meds for almost 5 weeks. That is to get all the natural hormone out of your body and then I had radioactive iodine to kill any remaning thyroid cells.
If the issue is that your W is not producing enough thyroid, I can tell you that it makes you feel like you've been hit by a train. It is an effort to take a shower. I had to take a nap after putting clothes in the washing machine. Now I may be a bit extreme as mine was totally removed and perhaps you W is just low.
Imagine how you feel sometimes when on Tues you make plans for Saturday. Then Sat comes along and you just don't feel like doing that any more. Times that feeling by 1000.
So the sex drive can be impacted. Be patient, as the meds take a while to build up. But once it is there, no more problems. It really is a pretty standard thing to correct. And most people who are on meds don't have any problems or need to adjust meds up or down.
Lee - yeah, you've come to the right place to find out about thyroid disease!!! I've been too high, had my thyroid irradiated, went REALLY low, and am now thank goodness doing well. Also, I'm an M.D., so I know all the technical answers.
Libido - yes, definitely affected by thyroid disease. When you are low thyroid, every day can be like wading through knee-deep mud. Everything is such an effort. Even sex. This can definitely get better as they replace her thyroid hormone. But be patient - it can take a while for them to get it adjusted properly. They usually start off with a low dose, wait six weeks for the blood tests to even out, recheck, then increase the dose if needed, wait 6 more weeks, etc. For me, it took 4 months from the time they started me on synthroid to when I finally started to feel like a normal human again (unfortunately - just long enough for my H to drift into an affair )
Low thyroid can also cause depression, thinning hair, muscle weakness, muscle cramps, dry skin - all kinds of bad things. With any luck, your W will eventually start feeling better than she has in a long time.
Be supportive. I still can't entirely forgive my H for not being there for me during that time, although I now realize his own depression was playing a part in that.
Also - be aware, as they replace her thyroid hormones - don't rely entirely on the lab numbers. It's still a "normal range" - meaning you could be at the low end of the normal range, but it could be too low for you - you may need to be at the high end of the normal range.
Feel free to ask me any questions. Oh, and Mal had her gallbladder out recently, didn't she? She might have some pointers for you (she's over on Hopefulness).
Hi Lee! Just catching up with you! Stick by your W right now and try to be supportive of her while she is going through this.
I think one of the things I resent most about my sitch is that my H left while I was in a depression and I was doing and saying things that I normally wouldn't. Give your W a break for a few months...you'll both be glad you did!!
Happiness is like a butterfly: the more you chase it, the more it will elude you, but if you turn your attention to other things, it will come and sit softly on your shoulder.... (thoreau)
Sex is also a mind thing. If she sees and feels you caring about her and her needs during this difficult time, I would suspect once her medical problems are leveled out, all that love will be returned. There is nothing like having someone by your side and just understanding during a difficult time. You don't need to fix things, just listen and be there for her. If the low sex drive is medical related, the pay off for getting this sorted out could be wonderful. Hang in there, you have come so far!
Thanks everyone for responding. I feel like such an @ss for acting as selfish as I have been. I didn't realize that the thyroid could cause so much stuff.
Now Im hoping and praying that it helps. That maybe she will start to feel very well and maybe that will help with the old libido(SP). I think it is time for me to start the acting as if things are ok and really trying to be more supportive of her and everything she is going through.
I wish she would have sat me down and told me really how she was feeling. All she every said was that im just tired I need more sleep and then would sleep 12 hrs. So I really didn't know what to think.
I have notice that it is starting to have some effects on my W. She seems to sleep less has more energy and the whole thing.
Hope you are contiuing to do well. 
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