Peicing but Angry and Confused.......HELP !

[native]

First of all, I really do appreciate both of you posting your thoughts here to help me sort out this mess.

Each of you has said things that have been helpful. Thanks for sharing you points of view.

As for me, I don't think I would follow through anything with an OW unless and until we got a D.

And we won't know what will happen in 11 mos. when the time of seperation is over.

Right now I am struggling with my feelings. I have just begun to wonder if it can work out. If I have the stamina required to deal with W's snappy, abusive attitude, to put up with someone who at this time does not seem interested in working on herself.

And btw, everyone in our families think the counselor dropped the ball on a lot of things (she is seeing a new one now, but who knows if that one is any better ?), but I am not so sure that W was as forthcoming about her stuff as she needed to be.

I don't know all that they talked about since I wasn't there most of the time.

BTW, how can it be called marital counselling when only one spouse was there ? She claims to everyone she was going those 7 yrs. alone for marriage counselling, trying to save our marriage.

She only ever asked me once (last fall) if I wanted to go by myself to see C. I said, well, maybe, but the only thing I thought I might talk about was my frustrations w/ W., which I didn't think would change.

But apparantly in retrospect she was actually saying, ' You need to go, buddy, cause you're the one who is messed up'.

So much for clear communication.