This afternoon X called a total of 5 times. I still haven't responded. The first four she did not leave a message and they showed up as missed calls on my cell. The 5th time she left a message that said it was her that had called the previous times, but she was unable to leave a message and did not want me to think she was being mean ("made her think it did." Yoda). She ended the message with, "I'll talk to you later" ("Hummmmm" Yoda).
I'm trying to decide whether I should respond (in any way) or not.
"What do you advise, master?" Anniken Skywalker
"Patience" Obi Wan
"Fear is the mind-killer" Muad'Dib Me 53, XW 44, DD 14, DS 12 Bomb and OM 12/15/06 Separated 01/02/07 Divorced 05/13/08 X married OM(OMH) 08/2009 Married 06/09/13
So far X called only once today. Maybe she didn't need to call more because she left a message on the first call.
The message was "to let me know" that DS had finished his homework for the third day in a row and he was "totally proud of himself." DS was having some issues with completing his homework in a timely manner as he transitioned from the lazy days of summer back to school.
I still have not returned her calls or messages. I don't know if she is trying to get a rise out of me or not.
Any comments, suggestions, 2x4's?
"Fear is the mind-killer" Muad'Dib Me 53, XW 44, DD 14, DS 12 Bomb and OM 12/15/06 Separated 01/02/07 Divorced 05/13/08 X married OM(OMH) 08/2009 Married 06/09/13
She called two more times and I answered the phone on the second call.
She answered and the first thing she said was, "I was beginning to think you were trying to avoid me." (so it wasn't about our son?)
I answered the phone because I even thought it might be him calling as he called an left a message yesterday. I did get to speak with both of my children. I miss them so badly.
"Fear is the mind-killer" Muad'Dib Me 53, XW 44, DD 14, DS 12 Bomb and OM 12/15/06 Separated 01/02/07 Divorced 05/13/08 X married OM(OMH) 08/2009 Married 06/09/13
Yeah, it's hard to go dark/dim with kids. I can't help but wonder if she was drawing me out tonight. I have decided I WILL NOT innitiate contact with her for any reason. I'm also going to not answer the phone/respond to messages unless they involve the children.
It's so sad that the kids won't say goodbye and hang up when talking to either one of us without handing the phone to her or me. D did that tonight when I said goodbye. I'll have to just hang up even thought they are handing the phone to her.
Another funny thing is that we came to a final agreement on the financials a couple of weeks ago and she was so eager to get it all wrapped up but nothing more has come of it.
A 180 for me would be to ask/push for it to be concluded.
"Fear is the mind-killer" Muad'Dib Me 53, XW 44, DD 14, DS 12 Bomb and OM 12/15/06 Separated 01/02/07 Divorced 05/13/08 X married OM(OMH) 08/2009 Married 06/09/13
The first message she left was about us getting together to talk about son's feet which she fears may be flat. I say Bravo Sierra. That discussion could wait until we swap kids on Sunday. I suspect she now feels I will respond to her if it's about the kids.
The scond message she left, on the fourth call, asked me to "please call" her when I got the message. I called her and she had wanted me to pick up the kids for her (isn't that what caused our last fight?). By the time I called her she had found another mother at the same aftercare who would pick them up for her.
Continuing to be dim. There's a hurricane coming this way which will be a level 1 to a tropical storm by the time it gets inland to us. Only time will tell how bad it will be and how dim I will be.
"Fear is the mind-killer" Muad'Dib Me 53, XW 44, DD 14, DS 12 Bomb and OM 12/15/06 Separated 01/02/07 Divorced 05/13/08 X married OM(OMH) 08/2009 Married 06/09/13
I haven"t been answering the phone when x calls and it's just pissing her off. I kinda new this would eventually happen so I'm not sure if this is the thing to do or not.
She just left a message to the effect that she has called, left messages, etc. and if I don't want contact with her to let her know, I can text her my response if I wish.
"Fear is the mind-killer" Muad'Dib Me 53, XW 44, DD 14, DS 12 Bomb and OM 12/15/06 Separated 01/02/07 Divorced 05/13/08 X married OM(OMH) 08/2009 Married 06/09/13
What if you said "I'm sorry, but I'm really busy sometimes and I just don't have time to respond immediately." If it is an emergency, though, let me know.
Then make yourself busy!
Definitely cake eating IMO!
M: 16 years Bomb 4/07 OW 20s long gone Divorced 11/09 I remarried New Guy Cooperative r w/X regarding D
