Phoenix,

Originally Posted By: Phoenixdeux
P.S. Are you able to kick him out? If so, I'd do that. If not, I'd tell him you are done, and mean it. Do not share a room with him (or get out if possible) and start avoiding him as much as possible, up to and including going out without explanation. Maybe not even come home if you don't feel like it. Basically, make sure he know you are cutting him out of your life. He's using you as his doormat and you need to stand up for yourself. Go forward with your life. This affair will implode and then he'll chase you. He might even help it implode because he knows it's not going anywhere (he just wants a piece), and he will fear losing you.

He has to KNOW that you are done with him. Being angry isn't enough. He has to realize that you have kicked him to the curb before he'll take any notice (if he's going to). Up to you at that point if you want to try again.


I can kick him out but then I would be left to deal with the mortgage on my own. We are currently in two different rooms. In November he leaves for the CHP Academy.

I am struggling. In the past I have always been VERY outspoken and never held anything back. Now I am playing nice guy. I drop hints that I know about his affairs and when the first one started I confronted him with the things he said in chats and emails. This last one I sent an email to but when it didn't stop I didn't push. I think I can stand firm without being b****y but I fear he will run faster in the other direction however, what do I have to lose he is running in my direction and right now he is a lying cheater. Perhaps just like it took for me as a WAW he has to really feel like I am done and I don't think he gets that yet. How do I approach the sitch? Do I try to uncover the affair?


Posts
Role Reversal(original)
WAW now LBS part I & II
WAW now LBS part III(current)
T: 9 yrs
M: 8 yrs
WAW: Sep 06-Jul 07
LBS: Sep 07-pres.