I have a story for you and then I will come back with more comments later...
First off, my disclaimer...you saw the pics of my kids...it has been literally 20 years since I had someone in diapers depending on me (ugh, I'm old)...so for that reason, its getting harder and harder to remember the time in my life you are specifically asking about.
But a couple things popped into my mind, more stories to share than advice really, but I think you can glean the gist of the advice by reading the stories.
Story number 1:
When I was newly separated and dating, before I met my fiance, I was out at a club dancing with some of my gf's one night. This club was kinda sleezy, but fun, and it was for us folks aged 35 and up (versus the teeny bopper crowd). It was a great night for me and my girls.
This type of atmosphere is "dance only" for me... I would never get someone's number, go home with someone, or do anything else of that sort. But flirting and talking and dancing, you bet!
So I'm getting chatted up by a gorgeous black man (sorry if his color is irrelevant, but he was just so gorgeous)...and he's saying things like "girl, what's your story?" And then he tells me "no wait, I bet I can read what your story is just by looking at ya..."
He looks me up and down, pauses, thinks, then said:
"Ok well, you're divorced...you're out having a good time with friends, hanging out...I can tell you're pretty open about things cuz you're wearing open toed shoes...you got a couple of kids at home, but you're not in a relationship right now....am I pretty close?"
I was like "hey, that's pretty good! You sure got your game on". I wasn't all THAT impressed actually, even though he was basically spot on...but the reality was that nearly every man and woman in that room was in a similar position, so you know, the odds were in his favor. But I was being flirty and encouraging him...
But then he said something that SHOCKED me into being suddenly and completely turned on...he said:
"Yeah, a couple of kids right?" (then he kinda leaned in, lowered the pitch of his voice down into his throat and whispered...) "...huh, if you were MY woman I'd give ya a couple more..."
! ! ! ! !
Ok now, this is hard to explain but I'll do my best.
This man understood something about women that even most women don't understand. He understood that "giving someone a baby" is not actually sexual, its not actually spiritual, but its some how both and neither. To a woman, for a man to "give her his baby" - - is the ultimate way he can say he loves her and wants her. He not only wants her sexually, he wants her in an evolutionary sense...which - when this man said that to me - my evolutionary sexuality woke up immediately and knocked on my ovaries and said "whose there? Who just said they were gonna give me a couple of babies?" I was stirred up, in other words...and the guy KNEW I would be!
- - - - -
So S&A...if you can mull that story over for a while and comtemplate why a total stranger could affect me that way...think about how your WIFE, whether you say things like that to her or not, DOES feel that way about you ...and that feeling can actually be very quickly turned into a red-hot sexual feeling....
You, as the man who has given her two babies now, are the MOST incredible and sexy man on earth to her....whether that is ever expressed by her to you or not.
But you can awaken and provoke the feeling I described in my story in her, by placing the right words at the right time into her mind...
So I will be back with more because I have a somewhat similar story about myself and my fiance and I hope you will gleen some good stuff from the ideas within.
DQ
P.S. At the end of the night in my story, I left the club with my girlfriends, but before I left, I kissed the black man on his cheek and told him he had given me a special gift...he look bewildered as I ran out the door with my friends, and I never saw him again!
