LOL....I can't count! Duh! Youngest is almost 12, that is 6 more years...plus 4 years of college (hopefully)...that adds up to 10 years...not 16!!! Whew! Hopefully, S11 will be able to finish college in 4 years....our oldest is working on his 6th year. But, he has been co-oping so he has gotten work experience along the way.
When does the spew stop? I don't think it ever does. Maybe part of the reason why everyone tries, and should try in most cases, so darned hard to avoid divorce. My ex has gotten just about everything she asked for, and it blew up in her face.
I got custody.
I moved out of state.
I'm happy and moving forward with my life.
Imagine if you thought you were setting out on your grandest dream and adventure. If you thought it was so grand and wonderful that it was worth taking some losses and cutting familiarity away from your life. If you thought that familiarity (namely, us LBSes) was the thing that kept your life from being so grand.
Cut us away, thinking we're a tumor, only to realize we're actual organs. Cut ribs out long enough, nothing supports your heart. (My golden metaphor for today.)
So, they dropped us. Then, they found their lives sucked a bag of refried, floppy donkey d!cks. So, they have the fallback. Blame us.
I know it galls my ex to no end to see me as happy as I am.
I don't care. I am happy. Life isn't perfect, but it moves forward for me instead of dwelling on the past.
So, the spew will probably not end in the forseeable future, but that's OK. I'm good. We're the ones who survived, and if divorce leaves such a thing, we're the winners.
BigHands, Thanks for the response. I'm sorry you are still having to deal w/ the spew at times, as well.
I agree w/ what you wrote. I, too, have moved on with my life and I am VERY happy w/ where I am at and who I am with. My exH is not a happy person. He hasn't been for a long time and I'm not sure that he ever will be.
But, that is no longer my concern.
The spew no longer hurts. His arrogance ticks me off. But, I am a better person because of what I went through w/ him. I grew up! And, doors were opened for me that might not would have been otherwise.
As long as the "law" is on my side, so to speak, he can spew all he wants.
Thanks, again!
deb
PS. Yes, SG, I will be seeking lawyer fees....Thanks!
You hit the nail right on the head, Deb. It ticks me off that my ex thinks she should have so much influence over me. It ticks me off that she affects her own daughter with this behavior. Beyond that, it's mind over matter. I don't mind and she doesn't matter.
I went to the beach this weekend w/ my best friend to celebrate my birthday...the kids were w/ their dad. Before I could get home this afternoon, my D15 calls me up crying because her dad has been yelling at her.
According to her, her step-sister had dropped a piece of bread (I guess it was the second time). ExH started fussing at her and calling her a dumba$$. D15 said she (D15) didn't say anything; but, then exH started telling her (D15) to shut up. She told him she didn't say anything. Then, he started yelling at her for back-talking and told her she needed to shut her mouth.
She said that when he fussed at her step-sister, he spit all over her (D15's) food. So she got up and went to her room. That's when she called me....crying.
She really hates going to her dad's. According to the custody orders, he gets her (and S11) every other weekend. I was told once that once they reach a certain age, they can decide if they want to go or not.
