There is a post Survival phase...that has caught me a little off guard.
After my D, I was focused on surviving and getting my life back on track. And that period of time coincided with serious career growth spurt.
The D and career challenges engendered a sense of drive and determination. And now that both of those aspects of my life have settled. Well - I find myself missing that impetus - that drive... And I also feel like dropping everything and just sitting for awhile...
While personal R's are a challenge - professional ones come very easily to me... And I am at a point in my career where I could rise even higher rapidly b/c I somehow ended up being good at this business of rainmaking... Who would have thought...quiite a change from my work-related posts from 2-5 years ago where I was terrified of ending up under a bridge with my cats.
BUT - I feel this sense of being a little goalless... I am going to try and take a month off work later on this year... try being the operative word here... Really my life is wide open with so many choices. I need to figure out NOT what am I capable of doing - rather what do I WANT to do...
I don't really feel like driving myself into the ground with work and house stuff... I feel like I have been in "feel no pain" keep moving forward mode for 5 years now - actually longer b/c the first of 4 bombs came 7 years ago. I need a break.
I suppose I could set a goal of going out on a date. I am not sure why this is so hard for me. I mean I dated lots of men before I got M. And I was in several R's before I got married. I am very comfortable with my male girlfriends. I am usually at ease with men - so long as it is platonic.... So where is this mental block coming from....
In any case - other that The Block - life is good! I am very lucky to be where I am 5 years post-D.
