New month, new strategy

[istherehope]

Thanks Pisces,

Not sure if you're still up or reading this, but did your H go back and forth in terms of making contact/being closed off before you were sure things were improving? Did he actually say things like "it's not you it's me, not sure if I want to be married?"

I do see positive actions in my H, so not trying to discount that, nor am I trying to discount how important it is that he feels good about himself. It is simply that the more time spent apart, the less committed he seems to be to trying, at least based on his words. He went from "I'm trying" before I left to "I might not want to be married and I can't picture myself with you right now." It's as if with each passing week, he is closing the door and the time apart seems to make it easier for him. I can understand that the R is the last thing he'd want to focus on right now, and I don't want to pressure him in any way to do this. I only want to make sure that he is, at the very least, calm about my return next month, even if he is not happy.

Were there times during your period apart where things seemed to go backwards or at a standstill? We're not in the position at the moment where we can see each other often enough for me to judge progress, maybe that is the real issue. Monday was very good, for sure. I guess on the call with Jody tonight (assuming it's just me), I'll see what she suggests in terms of next steps. I feel like it's time to step things up a notch in terms of building the friendship, but I am not sure what that means. Also maybe I am completely wrong about that instinct!

I'll post later if there are any updates, either interesting H contact or actions from Jody.

Thanks for your post,

ITH