The problem is, when and IF the wife ever gets there, will I still want it. In my heart.
I'm not divorced yet. Until then, I have to keep some hope. I don't know the real reason she hasn't done it yet. Could be cost, but she knows she can do papers herself. Could be uncertainty. Could be guilt. I have no idea.
But until she does. We're still married. How can I truly start to heal? How can I move on? How can I do anything? When the D comes, then the process begins, I think.
For me at least, I think it's a gradual process. When H moved out I detached a little more, when I got the D papers more detaching, then every time he does something skanky with the OW or to the kids, I detach more. Every time I see my L. I just think by the time we are finally D that I will be 99.99% detached and getting closer each day. Karen
