PDT, I understand what you're saying and I'm going to keep allowing information to inform my decisions and potentially change my direction. I'm not married to a single solution.
If I was messed up and had a problem I would want my wife to fight for me and try and save our marriage and keep our family together. Of course, I would want that. I've supported her through some crazy surreal stuff. Non one who knows the story would ever say that I haven't tried and that I haven't supported her, but, this is too much. This burden is more than I can continue to bear.
I'll think about what you've said with respect to it seeming like appeasement. That is a remnant from my childhood and the way we tried to manage my step-father's mood to stave off his violent tantrums.
Look, do you think that I don't know what a divorce is like? I was on the bad end of two divorces. I'm in survival mode right now. I have nothing to give to the kids. I basically check out when I get home from work. Somehow I manage to keep food in the cupboards and on the table and clean sheets on the bed and that's about it. I'm tired, I'm worn out, and I'm close to breaking under the pressure. It's just me, Atlas with the world on my shoulders. At this point, I'm doing the best that I can and I'm beating myself up enough that I can't fix it without getting a beating here too.
PDT, please don't misunderstand, I appreciate that you've taken the time to lend your thoughts to my situation.
