Mom, thanks so much for telling me about your experiences. It feels so good to know that what I'm thinking is exactly what you went through too. And yes, he's asking ... what are you doing tomorrow etc. What to say, what not to, how much, how little etc. All a big tight rope!!! I want this so badly... and yet it's to temper it with being there FOR him... cuz that's what he needs right now. It's about him and I'm fully ok with that.
He's having breakfast with a female friend tomorrow,... then I think he's going out to do a recreational activity with a male friend (one I REALLY LIKE and is a stable person). Which also shows he's coming out of the fog.
Ali - to answer your question... does necking goodbye count as coming over last night?
We had a lovely dinner here and then watched the end of the movie. We talked, discussed some logistic stuff we need to deal with and I even got a little insecure because I thought maybe I had "gone too quickly" with one of my comments. He assured me that it was OK... and was very nurturing about it. We both need to take this slow, I think it's really sunk in last night just what a second chance we're getting. As for being cautious... I'm being pragmatic... there are no guarantees in life... I have to accept that what I'm doing... is a risk, emotionally and will impact our lives from this day forward.
I actually told him about my G-angels last night. (Maybe too much too soon... but hey, he talked about us buying a boat) *smile*
To answer Guardian Angels... early on, it felt like how I was "supposed to do" my 180 was handed to me on a silver platter by a deceased relative. The answer to what I had to do, and the thought of that person came instantly together. I have 2 person G-angels ... and I've even placed hearts, a small charm guardian angel and a charm with the word "hope" on it at their graves sites - Planted under flowers. The other was a family pet that was "his". I have a tuft of it's hair, and in trinket box that H gave me. In the trinket box is the hair, another heart, g-angel charm and the hope charm...also my wedding ring. I talk to these people... ask for their help... and pray to them for help. It's really that complex and simple all in one
Right now... it's just first step steps. Lots of hills and valleys to go through... one of the pieces of the talk we had last night dealt with being "gentle" with one another's emotions. As so many books say, I know he's going to have to deal with mourning that relationship ending etc. We need to learn eachother again and become each other's soft place to fall.
*Hugs* to everyone... Abbey
T:22, M:20 H:55 Me:45 H-OW PA: N/07 OW Jan08 Bomb:Feb/08 S: Apr/08 Back together Ap1/09-Sept/11 Oct, 2011, uncertain future/H is a mess. Dec/11 - Doin'friend mode. Some days are better than others.
What to say, what not to, how much, how little etc. All a big tight rope!!! I want this so badly... and yet it's to temper it with being there FOR him... cuz that's what he needs right now. It's about him and I'm fully ok with that.
